Natalie Shaw – Amitriptyline / At Mortlake Crematorium

Amitriptyline/At Mortlake Crematorium

The last time I saw you. You were sitting
at my table and you said, “He’s less
aggressive every time I see him.” You’d written
so very kindly, with such carefulness,
you were a gentle man. You held my hand –
odd, in retrospect. You said one friend
would make a difference and it made me glad;
you could be right. You knew that was the end
but I did not. All the things about you –
your love of social housing, countertenors,
the pills you took for years, that huge
weight of sadness never lifting – they lost
their home and flutter here and there like ghosts,
an absence I can’t house; I look; it’s gone.

Natalie Shaw lives and works in London, and her poems can be found in Fake Poems, Domestic Cherry, Antiphon 11 & 12, Butcher’s Dog, and Ink Sweat & Tears. She writes occasionally at

4 thoughts on “Natalie Shaw – Amitriptyline / At Mortlake Crematorium

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