I Know

That every new notch in my rifle, will be
underrated until I arrive, dead. I will never
court fame, never manage to gather people
round me in crowds, on or off line. I know

That I love wine, and it helps in the short term.
I know I won’t self-destruct, because it would have
happened by now.  I know I have friends, unenvious,
coping with my disassociation; an incredible son,
who has seen me lie down in traffic, and try to
convince him to do the same.

I know that as soon as I get well enough, I will
be dragged back into a system that will make me ill.
I know that everything has already happened, and that
this won’t be believed. My planet is ruled by me. You
rule your planet. I don’t find that hard to conceive.

I know that the derelict is as important as the famous,
that celebrity is nothing, and that generous friends,
family and animals are worth more than anything.